TOBY PETZOLD

Here’s some more on our next Vice President (emphasis mine):

Counterbalancing McCain’s reputation as a political dinosaur, Palin smoked pot when it was legal in Alaska, admitting, “I can’t claim a Bill Clinton and say I never inhaled”, and her children, Track, 19, Bristol, 17, Willow, 13, Piper, 7, and Trig, four months, have hippie-sounding names. Track, who joined the US infantry in September last year, is about to be deployed to Iraq. “It has really opened my eyes to international events and how war impacts everyday Americans like us,” she said.

The cool part about Palin’s marihuana use is that McCain apparently doesn’t care. Hee hee.

Come on, libertarians! This is potentially huge.

I’m watching the Sunday talk shows (by grace of DVR) and it turns out that John Kerry is still a pessimistic asshole who hates his country. Say! It’s a great mystery how someone as hated as the Chimperor was said to be in 2004 still managed to beat this guy’s ass by a majority of the popular vote.

Someday, Democrats will learn that they can’t keep sending up variations of Adlai Stevenson for the White House.

Americans hate pessimists and love problem-solvers. Americans may like to wallow in their own economic pities —I know I do— but they don’t necessarily want to hear it in their leaders. Americans usually choose happy warriors: FDR, JFK, and Reagan and Bush the Younger. I think that’s what they’ll find John McCain and Sarah Palin to be in November.

Here’s a helpful way to put things —from Jonah Goldberg:

The Democratic Party has decided, collectively, that Obama is qualified to be president. They are now making that case to the country. John McCain decided alone that Palin is qualified to be vice-president. As such, he bears the responsibility of that decision. If his judgment proves right, he’ll be in great shape. If his judgment proves shoddy, he’ll pay the price. Obama’s qualifications, or lack thereof, reflect on the judgment of the Democratic Party. Palin’s reflect on McCain. That is a huge difference.

Palin is at least as qualified to be the Vice President as Obama is to be President. I know that the Vice Presidency must theoretically meet the same thresholds as the Presidency since its occupant must —at a moment’s notice— be able to assume the higher office. But it’s also true that the Vice President has extremely limited authority under the Constitution. John Adams famously said, using his beloved Latin, “In esse, I am nothing; in posse, I am everything.” It is a modern notion that the Veep should have much authority at all, so maybe everyone from the confirmed libertarian to your average anti-Cheneyite should consider McCain’s choice as a gesture of his intention to return to true Constitutionality.

In any event, I like the boldness of McCain’s choice, even though it has staggered me some. But I do believe I know why he did it: Palin embodies small government values, self-reliance and individualism, and the potential that all good American men and women have for leadership. From what I know of her so far, I gather that Sarah Palin is a genuine and moral person with good judgement. She is in no way inferior to Obama in this regard.

Say, if Senator Obama’s so fucking concerned about Governor Palin’s inexperience, why doesn’t he offer to trade places with Joe Biden? Obama’s like an underemployed asshole who won’t get a real job unless he can come in as CEO of the entire concern. And the misogyny of his initial response to the news of Palin’s nomination is unquestionable. As I remarked to a certain woman I know of tonight, I had long thought that the claims of misogyny against Obama had been overplayed, but his reaction today persuaded me quite otherwise. I think the more that independent and conservative Democratic women hear about the Governor of Alaska, the more they will like her and her family and see her as someone they can work with.

Don’t forget that the “McSame” riff these miserable hippies are always trying to push is a total lie. They know that McCain is the real representative of bipartisanism. And with this choice of Palin —which is high-risk, but high-reward— McCain is also saying that he’s interested in being the one to bring ”change” to Washington. Palin will appeal to many different strata of conservatism and libertarianism and maybe even liberalism. At the very least, she is as “historic” a choice as Obama.

For some reason, I liken John McCain’s choice of Sarah Palin to General Eisenhower picking Richard Nixon for the Vice Presidency in 1952. I think McCain is rewarding her primarily for the potential she represents, as well as hoping that he will stand to reap the benefits of choosing a woman. He made a boldly political decision that is justified by what he sees as a woman of character and strength. This could be a stroke of genius and an appeal not only to women but to younger Americans. I am trying to learn all I can, although I heard from a relative of mine this morning that the Wikipedia entry for her said that she “began life as a man.” Interesting.

John McCain has just made himself and the Governor of Alaska the President and Vice President of the United States.

I’m finally getting to watch Sarah Palin address her first audience as the presumptive nominee and she is a delight. I am just beaming. She seems to have real respect for McCain, if not the personal chemistry just yet. And what a beautiful family. They say she calls her husband —who I would guess is most women’s ideal man— the “First Dude.” Ha, ha. Great-looking kids and just amazing details of her biography.

I think, if fair-minded women voters are honest about this election and what Palin’s elevation means for them, they cannot doubt that this is a courageous choice McCain has made and that Sarah Palin is a woman worthy of considering for the job.

Oh, and Barry? Epic Fail. Then again, maybe McCain’s announcement did you the favor of a mercy flush for last night’s bacchanal of banality. And how did you respond to the most interesting news of this day? With a graceless post-it note with your contempt for certain of our citizens. You lose, liar.

Where is Bill Clinton taking this speech? It is weirdly constructed and lurching. And just lousy with the cliches. I believe almost none of it. But he certainly gave the McCain campaign plenty of top-notch ad footage.

Thanks, Bill.

It moved me deeply to see Edward Moore Kennedy address the DNC on Monday. That remains my favorite emotional moment so far. Hillary’s speech, however, was a masterpiece. It is the most impactful moment yet. I thought Mrs. Obama was lovely and exquisitely controlled. La Pelosi reconceived the white pantsuit in famous fashion. Biden needs a monster performance tonight. And Obamachrist? I predict he will emerge before those fluted Greek columns tomorrow night with a whacked-out professional wrestler mullet-weave and a boast in his throat. It will be a moment like the one a person feels in the split second he knows he’s going to fall a long way. There’s an adrenaline rush that makes nonsense of time and propels him into the air: “FLY, damn you! FLY!!!”

Just go with the look, man. It works.

I don’t approve of American politicians standing before the world proclaiming the end of partisanism that will come by the election of Barack Hussein Obama. These people completely misunderstand American history and culture. When partisanism is finally defeated here, this will have become a totalitarian country. I don’t want to live there. I want to live with a cinnamon girl, not some bloodless angel of homogeneous heaven.

You know what? If the post-American Left are so interested in exporting our Constitutional rights to the enemies of Western Civilization, why don’t they take to the firmest possible position there can be on the question of a nuclearized Iran and the next- phase al-Qaedists? Why don’t they have a coherent message on immigration reform and border security? Why can’t they stand up for the legalization of hemp and the reform of our drug laws? Why do they support candidates who don’t support gay marriage? When can we end the corn subsidies and the other kinds of protectionism in a global economy? What’s wrong with school choice, vouchers, credits, and vocational schooling? Can we exploit more of our own natural resources, please?

Start making sense, losers.